How Being An Expat for 8-Years Has Changed Me


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266 comments

  1. During the six years I lived there, I once met another American expat, who advised me, “You can’t make their problems your problems”. That was some of the wisest advice I ever received. Every girl I met had constant, nonstop, grinding problems that broke my heart. So many have been raped. Many girls have brothers dying, long, slow, painful deaths of appendicitis, and other heath problems, because their family cannot afford to send them to a hospital. So many others are single mom’s with sick babies. The infant mortality in the RP is as high as 50%, in some areas. Babies are dying daily because the mom others cannot afford medical care. There cemeteries have acres of infant graves, with two crossed sticks as their only markings. Children are everywhere with twisted bodies, whose families cannot afford operations. Every girl you meet will be engulfed with personal tragedies almost beyond count. My heart was constantly broken, and bleeding. As a human, how could I not help, and thus my wallet was very often open attempting to save girls, and their families. Unless you are filthy rich, In order to survive in the RP, an expat has to learn, and work very hard to disassociate one’s self from their never ending problems.

    1. it’s true. if a person wants to help others in the ph, they have to do it on a case-by-case basis and with enough distance that it doesn’t become a dependency.

      otherwise, a person can go broke on the many, true, hard-luck stories that will cross their path.

  2. Hi reekay do you think that maybe a year from now foreigners can come to manila /cebu without having to quarantine? I really hope so.

  3. Bro, I live in the states and I’ve pretty much been doing what you said cutting ties and avoiding people including relatives that suck the energy out of me and only want something from me to the point where I don’t have any close friends. So depressing but I’d rather be alone than be with people that stress me out or make me miserable.

  4. Reekay is absolutely correct concerning that last part about the RP not being the States, bitterness, bad decisions, etc. You need to write his words down, carry them with you, read them daily, and memorize them, lest you forget, because, although we do not know each other, Reekay is, to a significant extent, speaking of myself, although I was smart enough not to have bargirls, as girlfriends. Most things about the RP are different, terribly different. The attitudes, believes, and much, much more are different. As Reekay mentions, you can be used, abused, and suffer horrible disappointment in people, and hurt, almost on a daily basis, leading to deep bitterness, One problem is that being in a different culture, with a different way of thinking, with a different way of presenting themselves, I found it far more difficult to read people – to determine whom to trust, than in the States. Reekay is much smarter than myself. He was able to figure people out, adjust his thought process, and attitude, and develop a philosophy, which has allowed him to live comfortably, and stress free in the RP. A whole lot of we Expats living there we not, myself among them.

    1. i suppose i can’t stress it enough… “take things slowly.” make decisions slowly. if you feel under pressure from a filipina for a decision about money, tell them, “i’ll have to take some time to think about it.”

      when they say, “but i need it now.”, well then.. the answer is, ‘No.’ obviously they aren’t comprehending the concept of pondering a decision that involves $100 or more of YOUR money. or the fact that you (shouldn’t) be in the habit of handing out cash just because someone asks.

      go slow. set friendly boundaries.

  5. The thing about relationships with Filipinas is their families are all dirt – desperately poor. #1. One thing is that, of course, you want to make her happy. If you meet them (don’t make that mistake), you #2. Will soon find yourself feeling more and more guilty. These two factors together will empty your wallet, and destroy your life savings, if you want to be a “Good Guy”.

    1. @Major Ronald Mandell
      You are generalizing ” all dirt desperately poor ” . With due respect , are you an American ? Coming from a country who has an increasing number of people who are homeless , I mean seriously ??? Besides that they maybe poor but not everyone will ask you to help her family.Also , filipina have this wrong impression that foreigner are all rich.hahaha !! .The truth is they cannot afford the cost of living in their origin.

  6. Yup! Most Filipinos are a lot less confrontational than Westerners – a whole lot less, UNLESS they have been drinking. You need to make every possible effort to avoid drinking with Filipinos! It could very well mean your life. Most Expats murdered by Filipinos involve alcohol. The problem is that Filipinos (complete strangers), will very often approach you, absolutely INSIST that you drink with them, and will become belligerent about it. I do not drink, but they will never, every believe that, because every male in the Philippines drinks, and the poorer, the more they drink. They will attempt to convince you that they love you, want to be your best buddy, but the REAL reason they want to drink with you, is so you will buy. So, the best way out of the situation (and maybe save your life) is to offer them money to buy a couple of rounds on you, while you walk on. I used to go out of my way to avoid bars, and drinking locations.

  7. Extremely good advice. Think about it for a least a day. You will get scammed a lot less.

  8. As you say – a lot of Filipinos wanting to get their hands in your pocket. . . Actually a heck of lot more Filipinos than just “a lot”.

  9. Yes, Reekey! Philippines. Land of the scam! It’s not considered to be wrong. Dishonest, yes, but not wrong, since dishonesty is not considered wrong, only normal. . . And, besides, God would not let me do it, unless HE approved. After all, everyone knows that nothing happens in this world without God’s approval.

  10. Damaged people damage people. Don’t try and fix them they can only fix themselves.

  11. I just hope I could follow you…

    For now stuck in travel ban, never ending divorce, jobless, depressed 😞

    1. *hang in there.* i went through similar circumstances before making my shift to the ph myself.

  12. This is a great video I wish I learned what he is saying out of high school I would of saved alot of money and time.

  13. Is there a course to show some one who never traveled before how to communicate and count money. Thanks

  14. Sir, kudos to you for all your vlogs, insights, positive attitude, streetwise and cleareyed wisdom, and your unselfish and ever-patient engagement with interesting, even weird characters, in any milieu you find yourself in–what could be more riveting? It’s like reading an enlightening, oftentimes humor-laden, and subtly instructional book one can’t simply put down or promptly forget. You always have an incredible ability to state in simple, eloquent, and lucid sentences what you feel for or think of a place, person, event, and even the most mundane experience in your enviable journey. You also have an uncanny gift of layering them with such well-told events and insightful thoughts you’ve never failed to share with your subscribers and friends. Such an embarrassment of riches, Sir: all your reminiscences and lifelong lessons from your past, mishaps, triumphs, hobbies, diverse interests, negative/positive adventures, travels, and encounters with all kinds of people and culture. You’ve been a wise guru to me since I first viewed your initial vlogs in 2012. Your online, life-changing mission must have also been crystallized during your wisdom-filled yoga moment of peace and enlightenment.

    1. thank you kindly for your articulate and detailed compliment. i do what i can to share the experience here. maybe help a few expats dodge some trouble along the way. 🙂

  15. Great content Reekay and a vast library on most any topic in Philippines. Keep up the great work! I will be back there soon and am looking forward to it.

  16. Thanks for the great video and insight. I’ve been watching your channel for several years along with a few others. I watched one in particular basically because the guy was a walking disaster. He imploded and left his family there in the Philippines and came back to the states. Makes you see why bad decisions and bad behavior are exactly what they are called. Thanks again for your positive content.

    1. running around making babies, getting married on a whim… never a good idea. if planning to do either, do it with much patience and planning. slow and steady. otherwise as they say, “haste makes waste”.

  17. 8 years and still on your honeymoon. Some things are just terrible in the Philippines and pointing that out is not a reason to say simply “love it or leave it”. You do not have to check your morals at the door because you changed countries. If you love a Filipino, your Filipino family, it hurts to see them suffer and a lot of the reason they are suffering is needless…foolishness. It hurts to see strangers suffering. When you meet ex-pats, they know how it can be if a mindset is changed, they understand. Getting together with ex-pats is to know that you are not crazy, not to complain about life in general. OF COURSE every expat knows he can simply get on a plane and solve the problem he is facing, so far he selected not to do that. You have money from abroad, you have choices that most ex-pats don’t. It is really hard to establish mutual boundaries, between expats and locals. Building your cocoon, Cicadas go 20 years before emerging.

    1. my approach has been to first determine, “what makes ME happy?”, and then focus on those things while insulating myself (as best one can) from all other weirdness that would cause inconvenience or distress. some of it, you just can’t dodge. having low expectations is key.

  18. I’m happy for you, you made your life, you speak the truth. I just got back to Alaska 2 weeks ago, was there 8 months, met a great lady that I will be returning to as soon as I can. I was going to go back to Alaska the end of May but that couldn’t happen. My long term plan is to do summers in Alaska and the rest of the year in the Philippines. Thanks for your videos.

  19. You are the Original Gangster of expat vloggers in the Phils. You have shared a lot of great life lessons over the years. Definitely need to avoid the low caliber broke expats who are cancerous individuals

    1. while i was there in 2019, a USA citizen can stay there up to a 1-year visa (tourist or business). most all other expats, 90-day visa. things changed this month, july.

  20. I met you at SM mall Cebu, you were telling how you were leaving for vietnam at that time , I was so happy to meet you i told you if it wasn’t for you and your channel I wouldnt have been here, you change my life for the better I was lost at home but thanks to you, I was inspired by your story thank you

    1. i’m glad things are working out well for you! perhaps we will meet again.

  21. Thank you for sharing your insights and experiences Rebekah. I always enjoy your talks.

  22. Reekay. I also am on my way out of California moving to Southern Utah. My new home is New Harmony Utah, My back yard view is Kolob Canyon. About the only thing I do not like about the Philippines is. Every time I go there it is most important for them to have me meet there Family and relatives and every time I come back from the USA. My girlfriend there and there family are asking me for money and at the same time they are not doing anything about working toward there requirements to enter the USA. Family members after you do not give hem money they want nothing to do with you.

  23. Stay safe Reekay. The idea of millions of hungry people searching for food in a large urban environment is somewhat frightening. It can get ugly really quickly in a mob scene. I hope the situation gets better quickly.

  24. Reekay,
    Thank you for sharing… I got some very useful information from you. I have been an expat for three years now and am trying to get the permanent Visa 13A. Do you have any information on this or dual citizenship?

  25. I’ve been an expat living in Cambodia since early 2018. If the pandemic hadn’t occurred, I would’ve visited the Philippines later this year for several months to see if I wanted to live there and scout a possible starting location (like Cebu City, Dumaguete, Iloilo, and a few other places). I’ve visited the Philippines twice, in 1999 and 2014, and thoroughly enjoyed it both times. Cambodia doesn’t offer me much, so that’s why I’m thinking of moving. I’m also considering Vietnam and Malaysia. I’m curious about your year in Vietnam. How did you manage to stay there for a year? What kind of visa did you get, and was it difficult to obtain? Thx.

  26. I am not an expat but live in Pasadena, California. While I love my city, rents here are crazy. I pay $2,025 for a one bedroom apartment which is 670 square feet. I think some of the relief you feel is due to the lower cost of living there. I just watched a video from one channel (Tim K) and Tim and his wife rent a house in Leyte right on the water for $450 per month. If I did not have a teenage son here I would seriously consider heading to the Philippines. Thanks for all the great videos.

  27. After living here 4 years the main thing I have learned is to appreciate the Freedom and Liberties that we enjoy in America. I like living in Philippines and the genuine friendliness of Filipino People. I plan to go back to America soon and do Full time RVing for 6 months to a year or at least until this covid 19 thing is under control. I plan to come back , Depending on travel Restrictions. If the Government will have Mandatory 14 day quarantine , Require aTravel permit to go to other Provences, Require me to download some app that tracks me where ever I go, Or other Mindless Regulations, Then I will just go explore a different country. I am sure many others will too. Philippines is changing fast, its nothing like it was 4 years ago. The people are still the Friendliest and most Polite people that I have ever met. Many other things have changed , And not for the better. I hope things get back to somewhat normal, but I don’t see that happening very soon.

  28. I’ve been in SE Asia for 24 years now, once you get to my stage, you kind of get numb to the whole thing – – you’ve already figured out all of the ins and outs, been there, done that… life goes on. But, no matter how long you stay, you’ll never be accepted as a local. I still appreciate the endless summer and the positive aspects of the culture.

  29. Hello Reekay, this is Jim. We talked before on fb messenger. I’m living in Cebu City as well but am living over in talamban. I am going to give up my subdivision rental over here and was hoping to find a relatively safe condo to move to, with not too many people living there and you were talking about your place. I’m trying to avoid this illness at this time, so I’m trying to find a place that’s not very full as well. Could you be of help. Thanks

  30. During this lazy coronavirus situation I decided to spend about 30 minutes just reading the comments here. What I found were positive , inspiring and wholesome comments by appreciative people that have been inspired and helped by you, Sir. This speaks volumes about the quality content of what you are sharing. I challenge anyone to do as I have done and see if you are not inspired by the comments as well.

    1. thanks, and yes.. there are lots of positive-minded expats that far outnumber the misfits. 🙂

  31. Nice video! . I remember your first vids in 2013. So,Much time has passed. I also lived in the Philippines after that(about 3 yrs), my wife is Filipina(I met her online and came To see her for the first time in 2014)and I have 2 kids (one with her and one from a previous wife) and also traveled a lot and lived abroad in other countries in the past. I really understand what you say about the heat, I love the heat too. I have also come through a divorce in the past in another foreign country lol.congratulations for everything

    1. that is great to hear and congratulations on your new family. best wishes to all of you.

  32. Informative and inspiring! Life is an evolving journey and hopefully we evolve with it. Thanks Reekay.

  33. Great Video! Eight musical notes (octave)- not seven. . .Sorry! I am a music guy. . .

  34. Reekay, thank you for sharing all of this about your last 8 years as an Expat but even more your personal experience in ways that most vloggers (most people) cannot express. I’ve been viewing your vlogs off and on for the past 3 years and look forward to seeing more. Please keep this up.

  35. Reekay you make so much sense, and I can relate to what your saying. Especially once you mentioned having your first heart attack. I would love to be in the Philippines in the province 3rd class city I love over in Negros Occidental. Myself and my wife have a 500 square lot of land over there. I’m hoping in perhaps 20 years from now living there full time with my wife and relatives.

  36. I’ve been a subscriber for quite a while and I really enjoyed this video. My Filipina wife and I have reached a place where living in the Philippines is very soon. Your perspective is informative and interesting. Thank you

    1. You are always on the positive side of things. Hahahaha I left FB for the same reason 6 months ago, don’t miss it at all. Take care and the best to you and yours

  37. Excellent overview of your life over the last 8 years. As you know that you are not happy in California for a variety of reasons and did not like the politics there I think was the major reason.
    Some people love California. I certainly love parts of California especially coastal California and being able to have a good lifestyle here. But I still have the travel bug

    1. I went to Carmel high, lived in Monterey. My move to the Philippines was a lesson in what I was prepared to do without, so that my family life was so much richer. It is either small fish in a big pond or the reverse. It is good to be king. As for a drop in from outer space visit, I would go to Cagayan De Oro, you can get in or out of the city in a short time, cheap place to stay, lots of outdoors local life, yet lots of support for tourists and public spaces.

  38. This was one of the best expat videos I’ve ever seen Henry extraordinary, my friend!

  39. From what you are saying, you have likely encountered many personal attacks. It is undoubtedly due to the visibility (YouTube) as well. Thanks for sharing. Your attitude is to be learned from.

  40. I have been here for just a little over a year and a half. When I first came here my GF met me at the AP & we have been together ever since. I suffered first from the Jetlag from hell ( 30 hours flight+ a 13-hour jump into my future + I didn’t sleep for 24 hours before leaving & slept for 1 hour in flight.) and jumped into cultural shock. Never really scammed because my GF a Filipina goes with me everywhere I go. Today I just go with the flow & don’t worry about things. I am happier then I have ever been in my life. Enough said.

  41. Thanks for sharing Reekay, I’m still a sort of young guy, but getting there (35 right now), but still figuring out my life, and thinking more and more about the expat lifestyle, not sure when though.

  42. Step 1: Beeing an expat in SE-Asia means you are first recognized as a walking ATM machine. If you can handle this, then you can go to step 2: Look out for a compamion who helps you finding the way through the dschunglel of customs and habits once fairly aquited go to step 3: travel the country extensively so you will find the place you might to stay for longer. Step 4: Get hooked, married and live yoiur life as good you can.

  43. Your choices actually played a big part in changing my life for the better and I’m thankful for that. Appreciate you Reekay 👍

  44. Henry it was a pleasure meeting you & Vi in Cebu in Feb. i hope to be back in Cebu when all this covid 19 passes some. I hope i get to see you again. I realize we don”t know each other well but i consider you a friend. I’ve been following your channel for 3 yrs now. I’m still with my GF in Cebu. I’m happy that you have found peace & happiness in your life. Peace be with you my friend Reekay till we meet again.

    1. thanks, i appreciate that. and eventually we’ll all be walking about freely again. look forward to seeing you again when things open up.

  45. Great Video, Less than 9 months ago I remember seeing your video’s and messaging you about coming out for 3 months. Due to Covid still here until who knows when, but I love the people and the quirky things here and have no regrets. Like you I like adventure and flow with the direction of the wind here but do not have quite the experience you have had in the Philippines. As I was watching you I can relate to so much you talked about, in the first three months I packed in a lot of memories and experiences here and it has changed me as well. Could not agree more about attitudes and enjoying life. Enjoyed meeting you a few times and know we would be great friends if our paths aligned in one location for any length of time. Thanks for all you do. Smiles

    1. i’m sure we’ll meet again at some point, after things open-up again. in the meanwhile, enjoy each day.

  46. One of the things that I struggled with throughout my life was that I was always trying to make a friend out of everybody that was in my life. I finally learned after many heartbreaks, backstabbings and other setbacks that everybody is not my friend. Not everybody wants to see me happy. Not everybody will give me the breaks that they are able to give me. I could spend my life trying to develop a friendship with someone only to suffer disappoint after disappointment. It just wasn’t gonna happen. Finally I was set free by the realization that I had to separate my friends from my enemies. Even some family members would never be my friend and I would have to let them go. Work mates, neighbors, family members, etc. had to be culled and separated out between friends and enemies. I had to learn to trust my judgement, sixth sense and intuition on these things. Rarely, if ever did i misjudge. It’s just something that you can feel. My life has been so much more peaceful since i have cut the bad ones out of my life. It’s a continuing process that never ends. It’s sometimes painful, but in the end you will save yourself a lot of misery by discarding those that won’t ever be a true friend. js

    1. Like you, after years of courting that class of people i totally cut them off. Zero communication! My life has since taken a turn for the better. I continue to remove the weeds as necessary.

    2. it’s a painful process to discover not everyone has the same mindset as yourself. selfish people look for trusting people specifically to take advantage of them.
      but i’m glad to hear in your case that you wised-up and set some limitations for others. not everyone can be trusted. that’s life.

  47. Yes, Street Smart I Like That, Yes You Made the Best Decision and that will add years to your life
    California has become a Marxist, Communist State Puppets of the Globalist
    Yes Some expat cannot live in a foreign land because they are very miserable within them self.
    You can see it in their eyes Keep Away from them.

    1. @Reekay’s LifeBeyondTheSea Very Good Expression, Keep the Fence up Until You can Trust, If you Cannot Trust, Keep the Fence up Forever.

    2. they say that, “good fences make good neighbors”. same applies to strangers. keep a healthy distance. it takes time and consistency to build any form of trust.

  48. Hi Reekay I think you make a lot of sense . I am married to a Philippine Lady and we spend some time in Cebu and some time in Australia Covid has clipped our wings a bit at the moment and we are held up here . We have a place here as well as Cebu . Some of the expats and their partners get jealous of what we do (best of both worlds ) . One who we thought were friends tried hard to destroy us there in Cebu and to friends we introduced them to . We even let them stay in our place in Cebu for free but they busily tried to destroy us whilst accepting our hospitality . So you comments about true friends are so too true .

    1. your situation reminds me of how “users/abusers” are much like a wolf in sheep’s clothing. pretending to be friends for their own selfish purposes.

  49. HI i thought you arrived in Philippines in the 2013 not the 12 ?/ because you don’t have any video on the 2012 ?? ,,and for me living permanent in Philippines for 8 years ,only makes me more patient and swollen the incompetence they have hear .. AND i being in much more pleases around all Philippines than you .. But i don’t have the desire to become a blogger Don’t like my voice jajajaja

    1. @Reekay’s LifeBeyondTheSea I was in the same place you star in Cebu mualbual , i rent a house in the diving zone of the Koreans .. Not a safe place to rent a house ,,.and for me not a safe please to get sick needier …

    2. no, i arrived in the PH for the first time in july of 2012. i didn’t start vlogging as a channel until may of 2013, after i had moved from mactan to bohol.

  50. Great video Reekay. I enjoyed your honesty and it was a privilege to meet yourself and Vie earlier this year. Keep up the good content. Best of luck to you two for the coming years.

    1. thanks, peter… hopefully we’ll all be walking about and doing our usual thing before too long. looking forward to more freedom at some point.

  51. I retired 6 years ago. It’s been a true journey. I’ve gone through many changes & had many challenges. Now I have pretty much sorted out all my personal & financial problems. I’ve been living in Phnom Penh for the last 8 months with my Khmer girl friend. I am happy & stress free. It’s not a perfect life, but a good life. My only problem is that I must return to the USA & will have problems returning because of Covid-19 problem. I am not looking forward to being stuck in the USA for an extended period of time.

    1. i hear you. after having some freedom to enjoy a life away from the stresses of the usa, it’s tough to go back for any length of time.

  52. Your second life has been great, you started with a set of standards and improved upon them. Lessons learned has now provided you with the happiness you were looking for. A good woman can do that for you. Continue your Dynamic Journey of growth and happiness! I look forward in seeing you in many years to come.

    1. yep, Vi is as sweet as can be and a joy every day. truly. i’d almost begun to think people like her didn’t exist anymore. but they do. 🙂

  53. Great Video Reekay ! I rarely if ever comment but I’m a long time viewer since 2017 ! Stay safe and enjoy life always !

    1. good to finally hear from you, bob. definitely enjoying life one day at a time here.

  54. It was great Henry to listen to your outlook on life and share all of your experiences to us here watching. I am also a positive person and as such, I tend to turn all negative behavior and thoughts from others into positive ones. I have had my share of ups and downs but have always treated others with respect and understanding. After my new kidney kicks in for the better and I regain my full strength, I hope to finally travel to the Philippines (hopefully after all this Covid mess)! Stay safe for both of you and happy travels!

    1. rest up and at some point things will open up here. glad to hear you recognize the “glass is half-empty” crowd for who they are,

  55. Stepping out awakens the soul to be alive! It is like a kid being in a candy store with options. To not travel and experience life is to have never fully lived.

    1. @Reekay’s LifeBeyondTheSea Right….I agree here it is an Apple back home it is an Orange, can’t have it both ways.

    2. when telling that to someone back-home who hasn’t traveled, it’s like trying to tell a fish what dry land is like. they won’t know until they experience it themselves. and, as i mentioned, for some people.. they don’t want adventure. they want sameness. they find security in that.

  56. I’ve been coming to the philippines for three weeks a year for the last five years and always enjoyed all your insights and honest thoughts. This latest video was truly beautiful. You really have a great positive message and great insightful perspectives. Thanks for sharing your life and such great information…I for one, really appreciate everything you share. It really is invaluable. Keep on doing what your doing……cheers 🍻

    1. thanks, i do what i can to share the experience here. every day is a new day. 😀👍

  57. Greetings, after hearing what else could I say …. as always it is a gift of life to know that there are people like you. And as always I wish you both the best in life.

  58. This was a great content and thank you for sharing it. I am planning to move to Cebu after Covid. Can you please tell me which is better to live, Cebu or Mactan?

    1. even though i have strong, sentimental, ties to mactan… cebu is a much better place to live. cebu is much larger, has much more to do and easy access to the pier and bus stations for traveling locally.

      but mactan is much smaller, less to do and traffic to get off the island via either of the 2 bridges can take up to 3-hours, despite the short distance.

  59. Hello
    Greetings from California…i have learned so much from your videos.thanks for shar ing..i am working on my plan to retire to the Philippines….im thinking most of the expats are men and it would be easy for them to make friends with other expats….but do you have any suggestions for an expat retired woman to meet and have expat friends…in the Philippines…..this is my concern for myself when i make the move.
    Can you please share your thoughts?
    Kind regards😊

  60. I was in Taglibarin last February your videos helped me alot tried to find your jungle house could not find. Thanks for everything.

    1. it’s a bit off the beaten path, in the province area just east of Tag. the area is called, Libertad.

    1. i had already been in a relationship with a cebuana who was living in my same city in california. we’d been together for 2-years, so when i prepared to fly to the ph, she found a studio for me about a week before that.

    1. i boosted the gain to about +7db prior to exporting. anything more would have caused distortion. but double-check the volume on your device or youtube player.

  61. Dude. One of your finest videos. Take a deep breath. I’m live in Pawalan. Stuck in California because of Covid. Relax Bro. Don’t listen to the negative.
    .

    1. i agree. negative people can rot their own mind, but not mine. vi and i have plenty of other things on our plate to enjoy. 😀❤

  62. Your reflexion on personal accountability and happiness in he last 5 min of your vid is spot on. Self-awareness is crucial to growth and hopefully to reach a permanent life of jubilee. 🙂

    1. @Reekay’s LifeBeyondTheSea I agree, with age (50’s) one starts appreciating the simple pleasure in life such as planting trees and gardening, watching nature and sharing good times with family and friends. Keep up the good work with your channel. 🙂

    2. it’s how life works. people who excuse themselves and go into denial can’t fix a problem they think doesn’t exist. so they ony go from bad-to-worse.
      the rest of us, we deal with reality. we improve and appreciate what each day brings. 🙂

  63. This video really demonstrates very well how to deal with negative people. Found the advice very helpful.

  64. I think it would be interesting for us soon to be expats that are coming over before social security. Without u going into details. If your investments back in the USA. Plus YouTube etc has been able to support your lifestyle. Has your networth increased over 7 years or decreased ?

    1. definitely increased. financially, emotionally, socially and in overall enjoyment of life.

    1. btw, 2017 was the most recent year of jubilee. the one prior would have been about the year 1967.

    2. the year of jubilee is after 7 cycles of 7 sabbatical years, which is 49 years with the year of jubiliee being on the 50th year.

  65. Reekay I liked Vietnam also but 5he heat and the humidity to much for this old Canadian but I really liked DaLat so nice and cool very beautiful place

    1. i really enjoyed da lat as well. i wish i’d stayed longer. i went to a zoo up there and a cultural show. but the lake and cool temps were awesome.

  66. As soon as travel ban listed will visit again. Ed in SD, CA. I have an idea to blog would like some advice

  67. First time I went to the Philippines (Southern Mindanao), I was overwhelmed by the chaos, and excitement yet also humbled by how pleasant people were.

    1. We still have to grab some sinagang when I’m in Cebu next. As soon as they lift the ban i’m coming.

  68. I should say, more accurately, that I not only avoided pitfalls but maximized my enjoyment there with your help.

  69. This week I am getting a PayPal account. Will start sending a little regular monthly … mango shakes money!
    I do owe you for all the advice.
    Been there twice since 2016. Coming back as soon as things open. Planning to retire in Duma area (scuba, hiking, fishing, etc) by 2022. At the latest!
    Avoided a lot of grief , primarily, because of your channel.
    Thanks ReeKay!

  70. Yeah I was watching you since 2015. Being ex law enforcement I used to wince as you walked down darl streets very late at night!
    But you are not a little guy and have some martial arts training. Still not knife and bullet proof.
    But hell….I do the same thing! Hahahaha

    1. i went down a few alleys in vietnam, but it was just residential area where people live. the alleys are a shortcut to the other side of the block.

  71. I am in the Philippines because of your channel and friendship. Best move I ever made! I love it here!

    1. thanks! and for your friendship. looking forward to enjoying cebu like earlier in the year.

    1. the only ‘reason’ they gave was, “suspicious activity”. i asked for a link to whatever this ‘activity’ was and got zero reply. i later checked my FB for any flagged posts and still nothing. after sending them my DL copy, which they asked for, and several photos of myself, i had the account again maybe a few weeks and then they did it again. only then they wiped out everything and that was the end of that account.

      but never did they point at any specific post or comment i ever made that would justify what they did.

  72. Mentioned the humidity. But what about air pollution. Do you ever leave a city because it’s so bad? I mean air is the most important thing no? Great vid

    1. pollution is worst at the south end of cebu. not so bad here neary ayala or it-park.

  73. I always find a few nuggets to push forward on my own path. Good on yah! Kawili wili For the Philippines….we have the old insight, the Map is not the Territory – and my emerging corollary – the Philippines is not the Filipinos. 2020 is teaching us all that the required balance is more delicate than we first imagined. And from the Homeland…Mainland is less and less the best of America too. God Speed to building new homes in 2021.

    1. yes, definitely a rude awakening for 2020. but, we’ll get past it eventually.

  74. Thanks Reekay, another great video. I really like the videos where you just talk common sense. An unrelated question: which laptop do you use? I’m hunting for a new laptop and was wondering if you’re happy with yours, value for money sort of thing. Thank you, stay safe and healthy.

    1. my last few laptops have been HP and Toshiba. i’ve been happy with those. get at least 8Gb RAM, 16Gb is even better. and a digital hard-drive. i wish i’d gone with the DHDD.

  75. Hi Reekay! I’m a politician in a small township(Cavan Monaghan) just outside Peterborough Ontario in Canada. I’ve travelled extensively in Canada, USA, and Europe. Next want to travel South east Asia. That is how I found your vlog. Just wanted to let you know that I’ve really enjoyed your posts! Very informative,I’m certainly open to spending more than just two weeks vacation in the Philippines. I think my first foray I might try to visit Thailand, Vietnam, Cambodia and the Philippines for one or two months. I travelled for a year after I got my first degree. It was awesome and done at the very best time when roughing it built character and great memories! Now at 60, I want to keep the roughing it to a minimum! Keep my expectations minimal and roll with it. Just arm yourself with useful info!. You are part of my travel education! Thank you for sharing!

  76. Hi Reekay, I am just starting following your interesting channel. Congrats!
    Are you now living in Dumaguete?

    1. @Reekay’s LifeBeyondTheSea If you will come to visit over here I would be glad to get to know you in person. I would like to treat you and your g/f with my Pizzas at my restaurant. Hope to see you one day 🙂 🙂 🙂

    2. no, my g/f and i are living in cebu. we had plans to go to duma at end of march but… that plan went sideways with covid.

  77. Hi Henry, I have to tell you that your story was really interesting, I have been married to a Filipina for 14 years and we travel every 2 years to Asie Phillipines or Thailand and we are planning to live in the Philippines within 8 years, maybe not final. I hope this is as good for me as it is for you. Thanks for sharing your story. Greetings. 👍😃

  78. Nobody marries in Germany because of poverty. You get married for love.
    There is government support through a secure social system.
    Foreigners who believe that the money growing on the trees is wrong. Foreigners also have to make their contribution so that a social system can finance itself.
    Only wanting to live on the money of the German citizen is dubious and a bad thought of foreigners in Germany.
    They steal from German citizens for the money they have paid each month as a contribution.

  79. Hey Reekay! I’m heading back to Cebu in mid September! I’ll be starting my channel back up just before leaving. The count down has started. Wish me Luck.

  80. Sorry to bust bubbles but the year of Jubilee is actually at the end of seven cycles of shmita (the Sabbatical year). What you’re talking about is a Sabbatical year.

    Still the year of rest for the land is a good thing for the relationship too.

    1. i stated that the 7th year is a sabbatical year. and at 37:55 mark i then stated that jubilee is after 7 cycles times 7 = 49 years, with the 50th year being jubiliee.

      there is one typo though, the most recent year of jubilee was in 2017. (not 2019)

  81. As an expat, just sit on the porch, stare at the sunset n realize that tomorrow is yet another “free spirit” day to welcome the possibilities!

  82. You mentioned in a previous video that you came to the Philippines to marry the woman of your dreams but it didn’t happen because she had a change of heart.How did you get over that?You must have been super excited to begin a new life in a new country with a girl you were deeply in love with ,and then to have it all come crashing down like that must have been a real downer.I think a lot of guys would have returned to the the U.S.A. I’ve learned a lot from your videos, now I just got to summon up the courage to get over there.

    1. Im happy you didnt let a lesson learned make you bitter to the exquisite BEAUTY the world has to offer. Keep your head up and keep enjoying life to the full

    2. it was not an easy change to adjust to. at some points i was livid. but i finally had to resign myself to her decision to stay with her husband after he got ill and had to move on to a new plan. life is like that sometimes. just gotta roll with it,.

  83. there is no evidence that Jesus ever existed; he’s a fictional character until proved otherwise

    1. @MET-TECH LLC the written accounts of mathew, mark, luke and john are exactly the first-hand accounts you say don’t exist. but i think you already know that. or are being obtuse about it. but read those if you want first-hand accounts by men who spent 3 years time with him on a daily basis.
      but had i used an example of two characters from shakespeare’s Macbeth, you’d not have missed the actual point of what i was saying. and that’s the real issue here since this is not a video about religion. if you want a forum to share your views on atheism, there are other channels and forums for that.

    2. @Reekay’s LifeBeyondTheSea There are _no_ first hand accounts of Jesus. Everything claimed, whether by Joshephus, Piny, or Tacitus, was written many decades after the claimed death of Jesus. Piny, for example, wasn’t even born until 61 AD. I grant you that Jesus may have existed, as may the hobgoblins, my point is only that there is no proof. That being the case, I must treat him as fictional.

      I don’t know whether it was right for me to have picked a fight with you, because I’ve learned so much from your channel ! I was dazed, however, when you mentioned Jesus. My code of conduct compels me to challenge religion wherever I find it, other than places of worship. It _is_ your task to be convincing when you choose to discuss religion in a video. It’s also my task to demonstrate the lack of contemporary, falsifiable, evidence. After 2,000+ years, I don’t think proof is coming…

    3. @MET-TECH LLC the proof is there. i doubt you even read the article. which is fine, that’s your choice. but setting up one gauntlet after another isn’t necessary. simply choose to not believe the evidence. it’s not my job to convince you.

    4. @Reekay’s LifeBeyondTheSea Josephus lived decades later, so his writing is non-contemporary. We’re seeking contemporary evidence, not stuff written later, and not biblical circular logic. if you can prove that Jesus existed then you will become incredibly rich because you will have validated the claims of Christianity.

    5. whoever told you that didn’t know much about history. there is plenty of credible historic mention. equally as valid as the existence of the caesars.

      the most notable historian is Flavius Josephus who wrote about jesus. and then there are two roman politicians (Pliny and Tacitus) who wrote of jesus and his condemnation via pontius pilate. not to mention four first-hand accounts written by men who were with him. each but John were tortured to recant their account and none of them did.
      https://www.theguardian.com/world/2017/apr/14/what-is-the-historical-evidence-that-jesus-christ-lived-and-died

  84. Thank you for all of your videos. I’ve learned so much from you. I’ve been to the Philippines four times and had a serious girlfriend and a fiance. I’m single again and looking at a much longer move at the end of this year if possible. I hope to meet you someday.

    1. that would be great. keep in touch and let me know when you’re here so we can meet up. 🙂

  85. “Empowered abusive lunatics”……I see these type guys in the USA who go to the same local bar or pub everyday. They think because they go there everyday they’re empowered to run their mouths nonstop and be the tough guy even though they’re 60 years physically weak alcoholics.

  86. I’m a permanent resident for 5 years. Have seen you around Dumaguete. Get why you like the night time. It’s so beautiful here at night. Last time I saw you was in Kangs. You are much loved by Filipinos. God Bless.

    1. i think i remember that day. you were sitting on the indoor seating area? that was such a bittersweet day the last time i visited Kangs. i had gone there to drop off some goodies and a b-day gift for my ex-g/f. i was happy to see her but i was leaving the following day back to cebu.

  87. Hi Reekay, I really like what you said about people being accountable. Don’t blame others when, Blame spells your name. I always tell my co workers at Intel about your show,
    Stay safe and again Peace Bro!

    1. Bruce Brummond in his character building course came up with this acronym for Blame: “Big Losers Always Make Excuses”

    2. @Brian muckdee i do not have any criminal record, at all. i have NEVER been arrested for anything. ever. for anything in any country.
      anyone who says otherwise is proving themselves to be a liar.

    3. thanks for sharing about the vids at Intel. i appreciate it. and yah, a person can’t fix something if they won’t admit it was done wrong the first time.

  88. FB has become echo chamber of Liberal retards and low-IQ entertainers, and I regularly get hauled off to the Gulag, but I see it as a reassuring sign that I’m normal, not some cancel culture Fascist.

    1. i sometimes just shake my head at the number of people who embrace complete lunacy.

  89. Wow, 8 years..your more local than me. Bohol is awesome. Born and raised here,moved to the US and now back living in Dauis,Panglao. Ya’ll take care out there in Cebu. It’s getting pretty crazy from what I see on the news.🙏🏼

    1. Reekay’s LifeBeyondTheSea i hear you. It’s pretty much the only thing you can do. We’re fortunate out here(for now) but they are still letting LSI’s in, so who knows what next week brings. Let’s all hope for the best and stay safe.

    2. we’re doing okay (for now) in this area near ayala. just taking it week by week.

  90. I’ve followed you since very close to the beginning and I’ve been a long time Patreon supporter of yours. I’ve always wanted to connect with you but figured (and understood) you’d be too busy to respond. But hopefully one day we could meet up and have lunch together. I’d love to share my situation and hear the your wisdom and advice.

    1. that would be great, and totally do-able. let me know when you’re here and we can meet over some coffee or lunch.

  91. I am closer to retirement and I have been to the Philippines a few times. I plan to split my time between here and there in three month segments. Anyway, I have seen how some expat are so rude toward waitresses in restaurants. It’s embarrassing. I go out of my way to tip them well and thank them for work they do.

    1. @Mr. Ron Wrong. A “guest” does not pay. You pay for what you get and you insult and put every other foreigner there under a burden when you make people think that money does not mean anything to you.

    2. @Dan P Oh, so you are that guy. Well. when I go to a restaurant I expect to get the service the owner of the restaurant is providing for the price stated on the menu. If it ain’t a bargain, I do not go back. I am not playing some freakish game where she is miss sweety for side cash or the reverse. You don’t tip the cashier at Gisano, the service is part of the price. It is bad enough they overcharge us while under performing,as a general rule and YOU are part of that problem..What problem?… Where All Filipinos think we have so much money we simply do not know what to do with it so they might as well take some for themselves as they see themselves as broke.

    3. @dean and deanbear I never go back to a micro fine print +15% on the bottom of the menu.

  92. Why would anyone be hateful to you? You have been nothing but helpful on your videos and uncontroversial

    1. Jeffrey Fernandez… thanks for the encouraging comment. it makes putting up with the trolls worthwhile.

    2. I learned alot from this guy. That 3 month rule helped me alot and saved me alot of wasted time thanks to you. Thanks so much for your videos and advice. I think I learned more from u than I did from my own dad lol.

    3. it’s pretty simple, jealousy. when a person has failed at something and won’t take personal responsibility for their faulty decisions.. they look for someone else to blame or hate. and who better than the person who is happy doing the thing they failed at?

      any time a person rejects the reality of a situation, there are consequences. they end up in some level of denial and hateful fantasy. it’s just how life works.

      once they fall into that jealous motive, they try to hurt the person they are jealous of. from there come the slanders, gossip and hatred they spew.

      what these sad people fail to understand is that the fantasy they create is only real to them. nothing else actually changes. happy, content people go on with their own lives while the hateful person wallows in deeper and deeper misery.

      a hateful person NEEDS the person they hate.

      but the joyful person has zero need of the hater, gets through life just fine without them.

  93. REEKAY ,YOU HIT RIGHT IT IS OUR CHOICE IN OUR LIFE AS A PERSON TO CHOOSE WHAT OUR LIFE WILL BE AND TO HAPPY.GREAT VIDEO

    1. this is the reward for people who ‘own’ their decisions and ‘do better next time’. a sense of fulfillment and accomplishment as they persevere and improve.

    1. i’d LOVE to retire permanently in vietnam. but realisitcally, both Vi and I would be ‘foreigners’ there. i don’t see a long-term visa that would do well for us, especially after i pass-away and she’d be in vietnam alone. i figure we’ll eventually find a place in the PH.
      but for an unattached expat who is open to marrying a vietnamese woman, vietnam is an option.

    2. @Reekay’s LifeBeyondTheSea so not Vietnam, I am in Dumaguete and like it here, I have friends that live in Bohol and love it there. If I stay in the Philippines I might try Bohol for a few months.

    3. i’ve been giving that some thought. i’m torn between the amenities of city-life (cebu) or the quieter-life of either dumaguete or bohol, even iloilo or davao. still keeping an open mind. 🙂

  94. Reekay, I’m really looking forward to moving to the Philippines in 2021. I have done research and me and my filpina fiancé will be looking to settle in either cebu around IT park, or in Makati. I just have this feeling that my life will definitely change for the better. Hopefully when I get settled here, we can meet up and have a cup of coffee my friend. 😊

    1. that would be great. let me know when you’re in-country and we’ll make it happen at earliest convenience.

  95. Always enjoyable and interesting to listen to Reekay. I’ve followed most of your journey with interest and learned a lot over the years. I’m happy for you, for where you are are now, emotionally and physically. You knew what you wanted, and you made it happen. Wisdom is a great quality, I would love to meet up with you one day. Take care always you two and stay safe. Best wishes.

  96. Reekay, to you are 1000 % correct. Facebook is so unreliable. I have had the same problem with them.

    1. it’s beyond annoying. especially when trying to stay in touch with so many people.

  97. at 55 I’ve become much more of a loner other than occasionally dating compared to my social butterfly younger years .. im much happier in my own company rather than dealing with other people’s bs

    1. i totally get that. with some people it’s just not worth the hassles.

  98. Thank you Henry for sharing this invaluable information about your experience in the Philippines!

  99. Hey Reekay, I know exactly what you mean. I have very little close friends in my circle. Those needy drag you down people, I just weed them out.

    1. I Disagree with you, I Did not hear Reekay, anywhere in that Video Mention any thing about the Needy, as a matter of Fact, The Rich can be More Deceiving, and more Distrustful, they the Rich, Exploit the Needy, the Rich Fight with each other over Power and Rich are the One’s that will Drag you Down that is Why they are Rich, and I am not saying all rich are bad, many good rich, do the right thing
      SEE EVIDENCE HERE:>


      The Rich Fight with each other.

  100. (note: typo on-screen, 2019 should be 2017)
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    Join my Youtube Membership area and get access to my 3-series;
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    & Everything w/Reekay, at https://bit.ly/exclusive-reekay-content

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